How To Get Along With Awful People
Luke 6:27-38

February 18, 2001

There is a story about a Hungarian refugee we'll call Joseph Kudar. Kudar was a successful young Christian lawyer in Hungary, who was forced to flee the country. When Kudar arrived in the U.S. he had no money, no job, no friends. He was, however, well educated; he spoke and wrote several languages, including English. For several months he tried to get a job in a law office, but because of his lack of familiarity with American law, he received only polite refusals.

Finally, it occurred to him that with his knowledge of language he might be able to get a job with an import-export company. He selected one such company and wrote a letter to the owner. Two weeks later he received an answer, but was hardly prepared for the vindictiveness of the man's reply. Among other things, it said that even if they did need someone, they wouldn't hire him because he "couldn't even write good English."J Crushed, Kudar's hurt quickly turned to anger. What right did this rude, arrogant man have to tell him he couldn't write the language? The man was obviously crude and uneducated -- his letter was chock-full of grammatical errors!

People can really be awful! I am sure you can think of worse examples than the above. You experience them and hear about them every day. Just go to work. Drive home from work. Turn on the news. Go to the store. Wait in line anywhere. People can be awful! How can we get along with them?

Jesus told us exactly How to Get Along with Awful People! The first thing we need to realize is that you and I are awful people ourselves! We were awful to God! Of all the ugliness we see come out of others, we need to realize that we have been uglier to God. The Bible tells us that we are enemies of God because of our sins. We are hostile to Him! That's right - we have taken "swings" at God. At any moment that we don't put Him, his Name, and His Word FIRST in our lives, we are being awful to a God who has been so wonderful to us. We are also being awful to Him when we don't love our neighbors, as He has commanded us to. Do you think it is true that we can be just as awful as people we think are awful? I do. For all things to be fair and just and right, God should throw us out of his presence for good!

A mother once approached Napoleon seeking a pardon for her son. The emperor replied that the young man had committed a certain offense twice and justice demanded death. "But I don't ask for justice," the mother explained. "I plead for mercy." "But your son does not deserve mercy," Napoleon replied. "Sir," the woman cried, "it would not be mercy if he deserved it, and mercy is all I ask for." "Well, then," the emperor said, "I will have mercy." And he spared the woman's son.

God has shown us mercy, too. Mercy isn't something you deserve. Someone who is awful to you doesn't deserve it just like you and I haven't deserved it from God. But even though we do not deserve it, mercy is exactly what God has shown us. The wrath that He wanted to take out on us because of how awful we have been to Him, He instead decided to take out on his Son, Jesus Christ. Jesus hung on the cross that you and I should have hung on. Your life is spared. You are forgiven. That is mercy. That is how God dealt with us awful people. And that mercy from God is the beginning of our understanding how to get along with other awful people!

The next thing we need to realize is that Getting along with our neighbor, loving them no matter how awful they are by showing them the same forgiveness and mercy, is one of the best ways that we can thank God for his mercy! Jesus said, "But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also…" I know we want to thank God, but how easy is it for us to turn the other cheek? But what would be worse? Suffering that second blow from your enemy, or having your soul damaged with the hatred and revenge that would come out in your fighting back with words or actions? A bruise on the face that would heal, or a bruise on your soul? What if God would have struck back at us instead of turning the other cheek as He did to us? Jesus is trying to get us to see that our priorities always need to be eternal ones: love for Him, love for the souls of others, love for our souls.

Not only is forgiving others our way of thanking God and flattering Him by imitating Him, it also is for our best, too. Revenge and holding grudges doesn't get us further in life. In fact, it really creates difficulties for us. Not forgiving people who are awful to us only makes them bother us so much more. As a Christian, you really can't even be yourself. You can't even be around the other person. Worse yet, you find it hard to be in God's presence, because you are guilty when you don't show the same mercy to others that He has shown you. But someone once said: "When somebody you have wronged forgives you, you are spared the dull and self-diminishing throb of a guilty conscience. When you forgive someone who has wronged you, you are spared the dismal corrosion of bitterness and wounded pride for both parties. Forgiveness means the freedom again to be at peace inside your own skin and to be glad in each other's presence." Forgiveness is wonderful for both parties! It not only puts you at peace, but it makes you forget anyone was awful to you in the first place! And most importantly, it is a great way to say thank you to Jesus and make Him happy too. It shows Him that He wasn't wasting his time when He died on the cross to make you a different person.

Finally, we need to realize that as Christians, We are expected to be different than others in how we show love and mercy! How do we, as Christians, usually love our neighbor today? Would I be wrong in saying that we love our neighbor by being nice to the people we think we should be nice to? In most cases, this means that we are nice to the people who will probably be nice to us. Our love is usually a soft form of enlightened self-interest.

Now if, by chance someone would do something against us, our "love," which starts out as enlightened self-interest, suddenly becomes much more self-interested than enlightened! In the midst of what we see as a personal offense against us, we often react immediately against our offender. For example, if you do not exceed the speed limit by at least 10 kph, usually the driver in the car behind you will try to urge you to drive faster. Do you honk back, offer a condescending wave of the hand to the honker, or mutter some not-so-nice comments about the irate driver? As far as we are concerned, this is simply a common-sense response to an aggressive driver on a crowded street. It is in line with the way we understand, talk about, and do love; we are nice to someone until we are shown reason to be otherwise. Then we slip into a look-out-for-number-one mode. That is the way we are.

But Jesus tells us to be different. The normal thing is not to love those who hate you. He wants us to Love those who are AWFUL to you the same way He loved you! Look at vss 32-34. Jesus reminds us that to do nothing more than what others do for us is really nothing unusual. Even "sinners" do this. "Sinners" are unbelievers. Sinners who hate their enemies, will, however, love those who love them. Sinners who curse others and hit others will do good to those who are good to them. Sinners who take others' coats or property without asking, however, will lend to others if they are sure they will be paid back. So how is the child of God any different if he does good only to those who do good to him and does not do good to those who curse him or strike him on the cheek? Our gracious God works faith and love in our hearts where before there was only unbelief and hatred. This faith and love now fill our hearts and move us to show undeserved love and mercy to others. But like "sinners," if we only show love to those who do good to us, then we can't be credited with being God's children because we show that God's grace really hasn't changed our hearts! God has forgiven you. Be different! Forgive others! No matter how awful!

Remember the awful letter Joseph Kudar received from the person who insulted him and denied him a job? After reading it, Kudar sat down and, in the heat of anger, wrote a scathing reply, calculated to rip the man to shreds. When he'd finished, however, as he was reading it over, his anger began to drain away. Then he remembered what God said, "A soft answer turneth away wrath." No, he wouldn't mail the letter. Maybe the man was right. English was not his native tongue. Possibly this man had done him a favor by making him realize he did need to work harder on perfecting his English. Kudar tore up the letter and wrote another. This time he apologized for the previous letter, explained his situation, and thanked the man for pointing out his need for further study. Two days later he received a phone call inviting him to New York for an interview. A week later he went to work for them as a correspondent. Later, Joseph Kudar became vice president and executive officer of the company, destined to succeed the man he had hated and sought revenge against for a fleeting moment -- but then resisted with God's help.

In the long run, forgiveness is always best. Forgiveness is the ONLY way to get along with awful people. That is how God gets along with you and me. He has forgiven us for all our awfulness. Do you want to get along with others who are awful to you? Get ready to do a lot of forgiving! Amen.

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